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Paper Demons Haunt My Notebook Dreams
Monday, September 23, 2002

It occurs to me that a Paper Elemental would be a pretty nasty beast to come across. Especially if its paired with a Lemon Juice Slime. Its papercut attack would be aggravated damage, and could potentially have a vorpal effect, too. Odds are you wouldn't find them in most dungeons, obviously, because people visiting such places would be likely to have a torch handy, and that might prove to be a bit of a problem for the Paper Elemental. Then again, if a Paper Elemental is bad, I suppose a Flaming Paper Elemental could only be worse.

There would be several variety of them, too. You would have the College Ruled breed that comes in packs of 300 or 500, the Graphing breed that would always be plotting, and the Hex breed that could only move in six distinct directions.

I think there are only two things stopping their dominance of the wild. The first is the presence of their only true predator, the cat-like Stapler Beast which has tentacles whose sting embed a small metal wire into you and a tail with a claw whose only useful purpose is to remove said wires. The second is the unfortunate fact that most of them would stand only 11" tall and would likely find themselves being widdled on or made into nests by perfectly mundane forest critters.


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